working it out

I'm going out of town this weekend, on a cabin retreat with some of my girlfriends. I am hoping that this will provide the respite that I need to get my head together and figure out what the hell I'm doing. After talking it over with a few people, I have come to the realization that I'm actually pretty pissed off. I think that this was a crummy stunt for them to pull. On everyone involved. In fact, I think that they should have given us a lot more warning. I really don't understand why they have to leave so soon, there just doesn't seem to be a clear reason. At any rate, according to some other people around this is totally not kosher. Generally the accepted protocol is to either wait to retire until your students are done, or retire and have emeritus status for awhile so you can stick around and help them get done. Basically, you should feel like you have an obligation to your students. I know I would. I'm confused too because up until now I think that my adviser has been great.

My plan for now is to completely switch gears on the project that I had planned, and to come up with something that will take a lot less time and work. And I'm going to try to get on the grant of the other professor in my lab, and possibly see if I can't switch to having him as my adviser. He's also great to work with, and has been a lot of help to me over the years. He's just a young professor and less knowledgeable about the specific type of work that I've been doing. The problem is that he is in the dark about the whole thing (which also REALLY sucks for him) so I have to choose my words carefully for the time being. Hopefully he will know soon though so I can start making some plans.

Anyway, this weekend should be full of laughs, wine and good food, hikes in woods, soaking in the hot tub, and no kids or husbands. Bliss basically. It couldn't have come at a better time really.


Claudia said...

hmmm, weekend ahead sounds delicious!, enjoy!

Grad School Drama said...

Have a wonderful weekend and try to let all of this go for now. You know that the best options will reveal themselves to you.

I have to admit that I have a worry about my aging advisor--who is starting a book this Summer, but still that only gives me a bit of solace (I'm in my first year). So... while I haven't put in the time, yet, I do understand this and am anticipating the possibility of having a similar experience in the future.

Tapping into your other relationships seems exactly the right way to go. I'm going to put my feelers out about this, though. I'll let you know if there anything shows itself.

In the meantime... fun fun fun... and sop up as much love as will be thrown at you, this weekend.

B. Miller said...

I hope you have a wonderful retreat and come back refreshed and ready to take on this new challenge! Kudos to you for taking a little time to be kind to yourself.


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