pin a ribbon on my nose
Yippee! I successfully defended my prelims today! I was cool and level headed, answered questions thoughtfully, it was okay! I even told my adviser at one point "that's a good question." Which I would never in a million years imagine I would have the balls to do! Yay for me! Grad school is a very lonely road, but at least when you accomplish something you can feel like you really accomplished something. Not half-asses, not with someone's help. It feels pretty good. At least until the next step. This is really only about halfway there.
I remember when I first met my husband, we lived in Idaho. After only knowing eachother for a couple of weeks he took me into the wilderness in British Columbia on an 8 mile hike to a hot springs. I had literally no idea what I was getting into, the longest hike I'd ever been on was maybe a mile. Well, it was the most beautiful and excruciating thing I've ever experienced. My feet were totally covered in blisters, it was pretty hot, and we had to just keep climbing and climbing. We even got lost at one point. But then, we made it to this exquisite field in the middle of complete wilderness, not a soul around, and the only thing were little groundhogs that would pop up and make these funny squeaking noises. We could go back into the woods and soak in the hot springs, which there is just nothing like. A natural hot tub. A dream. The morning after, as we were cooking our coffee over a fire, we saw these two tiny figures off in the distance, another couple, hiking straight up a mountain. We were already high up, and these people were just going higher. It was really neat. But we were ready to head back.
It may sound silly, but that what this feels like. I've come such a long way. But really I'm going to have to be like that other couple and leave the comfort of my camp and keep climbing.